Hourly Schedule Printable

So…the hourly schedule thing was a huge success today! I ended up having to scratch my last hour’s goal since Caleb is super cranky today and he’d finally fallen asleep – there was no way I was going to wake him up to go to the post office!

Looking forward to doing it again tomorrow. I feel so much more relaxed at the end of the day knowing I achieved my goals. In a fit of celabratory madness, I made a printable so my daily schedule can look pretty too. Feel free to steal, share, and enjoy it :)

click here to access printable

If you’re on Pinterest, would you please Pin this post? Thanks!!!

Organizing Time

Ever since I wrote the post about meeting (or missing) expectations, I’ve felt like I needed to make some changes in order to meet the reasonable expectations I have for myself. So, last night before heading to bed, I made myself an hourly schedule. Each hour, I designated 2-3 tasks to accomplish so that by the end of the day I could say I had actually accomplished everything, but I only had to think about 2-3 things at a time.

Well, I am half-way through the day and so far so good! I have already crossed off half of my to do’s and feel like I’ve made some progress. Initially, I was going to start the list at 7am, but Caleb slept til 5:45am and then went right back to sleep after eating, so I gave myself an extra hour (and somehow it’s always that last hour of sleep that is the most restorative!). By the time it got to be noon, I decided to switch which hour I ate lunch and took care of putting clothes away.

Maybe I’ll even buy some time for a nap!

Anyways, I am going to make myself a fun template for each day instead of scribbling my schedule on a scrap piece of paper. Will post the final result when it’s finished.

(for the hourly schedule printable, click here)

P.C.S.-ING

The letters ‘p’, ‘c’, and ‘s’ hold a lot of meaning for military families. Our Permanent Change of Station is coming at the end of June and it seems so much more real now that we’ve gotten our assignment.

That’s right – we found out where we are moving! A few weeks ago, I was so nervous about the impending change that I had to write a post to process my thoughts. I thought about making this a long post where you had to guess (like I did when we moved to Vegas), but I don’t have the brain cells. Haha.

So…here it goes!

We are leaving Vegas at the end of July for Andrews Air Force Base in Washington, D.C. It will be bittersweet to leave our wonderful friends and church family here, but it is exciting to think about the new adventures waiting for us.

It is certainly disappointing that there aren’t any options for getting closer to “home”. With the context of having lost my dad, we desperately want to be as close to family as we can, but D.C. is still somewhat of a home coming for me. My grandmother grew up in the Capitol City and much of our family still lives near by. It’s a city that gets me excited with the wonderful museums, parks, history, and political prestige. I can’t wait to bring Caleb to the National Zoo and the Air & Space Museum to experience some of my favorite childhood places and memories with him.

There are many other things I want to share about our transition, but this will have to do for now. Especially looking forward to living near this bunch.

Dear New Mom: Balancing Expectations

Dear New Mom:

Balancing expectations is extremely difficult no matter who you are or which season of life you are in. I’ve found it nearly impossible in motherhood. Take today, for example: I have had a nasty chest cold for a few days and have developed a fever. As in, the “to do” list got thrown out the window and I’m stuck on the couch for the day.

I was supposed to run errands, go grocery shopping, do some housework, and get ready for a tea party tomorrow. Instead, I’m drinking tea, stuck on the couch, and feeling overwhelmed by the chaos around me. A couple weeks ago I had a total melt down. It ended in me sobbing to Keith that I just can’t seem to be a good enough wife and his life must’ve been easier before I came along. When he scoffed at me, I realized I was the only one seeing myself as a failure. Somehow I was putting ridiculous expectations on myself that I could never possibly fulfill.

I think part of my issue is that I am approaching motherhood from the lens of a former full-time teacher. I see each day as a list of things to accomplish and feel as if I’ve failed if they don’t get crossed off. My days are less quantifiable since there are not many deadlines in life anymore. I am learning to give myself grace and in the midst of it all, I realized my priorities were grossly misplaced.

I realized I was trying to please Keith. I was working for his acceptance instead of trusting that he loves me and wants me to be his wife (and his baby mama) because of who I am, not what I have earned or accomplished. In her book Grace for the Good Girl, Emily Freeman, puts it perfectly. She is referring to how we try to earn God’s acceptance, but it’s the same idea.

Though I never would have admitted it had I been asked, my deepest belief was that I had to perform for God in order to earn his acceptance. I would try hard to muster up the motivation I thought was required of me to achieve it, but there was always a sense of desperation, frustration, and fear that perhaps I wasn’t doing enough. That was the problem with my checklist theology: sometimes my list remained unchecked…I was trying to satisfy the law I had in my head…[I was] unable to perform anymore, defeated from all the effort. Instead of facing the failure and allowing the law to show me my need for a Savior, I consoled my failure with new and improved intentions to prove myself by myself. And the cycle continued. (p70)

I desperately need to stop trying to put my success in my checklist. Keeping home from chaos is a major part of this new full-time job, but my identity doesn’t rest in my ability to do so. Good thing it also doesn’t rest in how fresh the fruit in the fruit bowl is.

You see, some days we are able to accomplish everything we set out to. Other days we just have to accept defeat. And, don’t forget, those babies won’t be babies forever. Some days you just need to snuggle them and kiss their squishy little cheeks. There will always be more cooking, cleaning, and laundry to be done.

New mom, lighten up on yourself. You don’t have to earn your husband (or anyone else’s) acceptance, no matter how strongly you feel you do. Rest easy knowing you’re the right mom and wife for you family and no one will ever remember you by how clean (or not) your house was. Love on your family and everything else will fall into place.

Cloth Diapers

I knew from the beginning I was interested in doing cloth diapers. Laundry doesn’t bother me and I loved the idea of not adding to landfill waste. We started cloth diapering when Caleb was about two weeks old. I was so nervous to try it out.

When we finally got around to it, Caleb’s skin on his lower abdomen started breaking down. It was literally falling apart, so we went straight back to disposables until he got through that newborn “heavy wetter” stage. He’s still a heavy wetter, but can go 3-4 hours without a diaper change instead of having a full diaper every 1-2!

I use one cap-full of Luca’s Baby Wipe Juice in a spray bottle filled with water as wipe spray. We spray some on a flannel wipe and it (almost) offsets the smell of dirty diapers.

We have the Bummis flannel wipes, but you could just as easily make your own out of flannel remnants or scraps.

We use Bummis Organic Prefolds, fleece I cut from a remnant, and tried the diaper fasteners, but will save them for another baby since Caleb wets way too much.

This is the normal prefold style of cloth diapers: just fold in threes and place in the diaper cover.

After some trial and error, we discovered the Newspaper Fold was the right one for the Little Monkey. You start by folding a portion of the diaper up.

Next step is to fold the diaper in threes and tuck in the part where it’s folded over. This way, you can add a tri-fold diaper inside (we don’t), but at least there is more bulk up where the diaper has to hold most moisture.

Place some fleece over the top (to wick away moisture and prevent his skin from breaking down) and insert into the diaper cover. We use Thirsties diaper covers; I prefer the snaps to the velcro.

Note on the diaper covers: the random snaps down the front are to adjust the size. I did not know this at first and it probably had something to do with all our issues. Now we have it adjusted one snap smaller and it is a perfect fit!

Here’s a ghetto picture of how to use the diaper fastener. You start with pulling the left side around the baby and insert the fastener. Pull to the right and hook it into the ride side. Make sure the bottom is all tucked in and pull the bottom part of the fastener down to secure it in.

Maintenance of the diapers is crucial to their success. The Bummis website has really helpful instructions on how to prep the diapers for the first use. Between use and washing, I put dirty diapers (the prefold, fleece, cover, and flannel wipes) in a large wet bag. There are plenty of brands out there, but my favorite is Planet Wise. I also have several small ones for the diaper bag, stroller, etc.

When it’s time to clean the diapers, I just dump everything into the washer. One hot water cycle with no detergent and one hot water cycle with detergent (I love Charlies Soap). Since he hasn’t started solids yet, everything in his diaper is water soluble; eventually I’ll have to dump the contents in the toilet before throwing in the wet bag. I have been drying everything in the dryer as well and haven’t had any issues.

The major concern with cloth diaper maintenance is making sure they are clean; if there is too much buildup on them, they will not be absorbent. If you think the diapers aren’t absorbing, just run them through a few extra cycles (with detergent). Also, since I haven’t gotten any pocket diapers yet, we still put Caleb in disposables at night. He wakes up with the slightest amount of extra moisture, so we decided our sleep is more important!

I hope that’s helpful, I tried to be as thorough as possible! Feel free to ask any questions.

(I am writing this without receiving any compensation from the above-named companies. The opinions expressed are my own.)

Dancing Willow Photography: Official Website

Many of you have been following my photography and I have finally gotten around to starting a website of sorts. It’s still meager for awhile, but please sign up to follow the posts that will be coming along soon!

click to visit site

Dear Dad: Valentine’s Day

Dear Dad:

I’ve never been a huge celebrater of Valentine’s Day; you and mom did a great job of demystifying such a silly holiday. Today just feels different – somehow this “holiday” is making me miss you more than Thanksgiving or Christmas.

Every year, you always found the silliest cards and filled them with affirmations and words of encouragement. I still have a little Snoopy valentine; I’m pretty sure it came with a lollipop stuck inside. You always knew exactly what I needed to feel loved.

Keith is probably the only guy on the face of the Earth that wishes his wife were more romantic. I got him a little something from Costco (that’s where everybody gets romantic gifts, right?!) and accidentally left them out on the counter. His first gift was something sweet: dried mangoes that are super addicting. The other was a symbol of our love and how I feel about him: the movie Baby Mama. After all, I am his baby’s mama. :)

In all seriousness, today I’m thinking about that conversation we had in August after the chemo toxicity scare. You were adamant in making sure I understood that I couldn’t do anything to make you love me any more. I was so touched that it was so important to you that I know that you love me unconditionally. I will always be thankful for the depth of your love.

I was comforted by this verse that Mom sent this morning:

For the Lord is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations. Psalm 100:5

Your faithfulness to God was obvious to all of us and God was equally faithful to you. Your love and faithfulness for me has helped me to understand just how big God’s love is for me and there’s nothing I can do for him to love me any less.

Celebrating today with my little Valentine and so thankful for the ways he reminds me of you.

Love you, Dad.

Rebecca

Dear New Mom: Relax

Dear New Mom:

Now that I’m a veteran mom of 4 months (it’s okay, go ahead and laugh; it’s not a very long time, but it also feels like forever!), I feel like I’ve got a few things to share with new moms. The most important of which is RELAX!

Babies are incredibly resilient. They can withstand more physical and emotional stress than we give them credit for. Caleb rolled off a 1.5 foot high ottoman at 4 weeks old: it barely fazed him and I think Keith was more traumatized! Babies don’t know if you’re doing attachment parenting or BabyWise. Babies don’t really care. And, honestly, it doesn’t really matter. RELAX.

I was most worried about getting on a schedule and finding our groove as quickly as possible. Take a moment and laugh at me because that is absolutely ridiculous. For at least the first two weeks, you will be in survival mode. There’s nothing you can do about it. You and baby have just been through a lot of physical and emotional stress. You need a lot of rest and time to get to know one another. Even now that Caleb is almost 4 months, we are only just hitting our stride with napping. You’ll get there – soak in the moments you have with that sleepy little one. He or she will wake up soon enough and not want to snuggle any more. Laundry will get done by your hubby (or maybe not), but it doesn’t matter. You can stay in your pjs for three days if you want. Nobody cares: you’re a new mom, RELAX!

The one thing that has caught me most off guard is how quickly Caleb has picked up on new “tricks”. This kid is scary smart. I ask him to slow down on a regular basis. I can’t catch up. But it’s not a competition. Other kids will learn some things faster than him and will probably grow bigger than him. That’s okay. Each kid is so incredibly unique. Celebrate what your child is learning and how he or she is growing at their own pace. Don’t drive yourself crazy by comparing your baby to anyone else. Your baby just wants your love and snuggles from the very beginning, so don’t focus on achievements, just RELAX.

Have I mentioned that babies are resilient? Letting other people hold him or her will not kill the baby. More importantly, it will not kill you. Figure out what’s most important to you and which boundaries you are not willing to compromise on and just let everything else go. For example, when Caleb was three weeks old, we flew home for my dad’s funeral. During the reception afterwards, I had no clue where Caleb was. I knew someone in the family had him at all times and my friend was in “charge” of him; I knew that he was never out of her sight, so I didn’t even worry. But, when Caleb gets overtired, I’m all over that. There are very few people I’ll let hold him when he gets to that point because I know there’s only a small window before it will be impossible for him to fall asleep. You’ve got to make choices and let everything else roll off your back. RELAX.

Did you ever swear you’d never be like your parents? That’s fine. But guess what: you’re going to make your own mistakes with your kids and there’s nothing you can do about it. RELAX.

Shut down the computer. Hand the baby over to someone. Go do something that helps you relax. It doesn’t matter if it’s just 5 minutes. Go relax.

And don’t even get me started on feeling like you’re not being the “right” kind of parent or you’re not accomplishing enough. That’s another letter for another day.

Take the piece of advice a wise woman gave me: “You are designed to be just the right parent for your children.” So pour yourself a cup of tea, grab a book, or just snuggle that baby and relax!

Photo A Day

I recently started doing the Fat Mum Slim photo challenge on Instagram. Here are the first few pictures:

2/9 “Guilty Pleasure”

2/10 “3 O’Clock”

2/11 “Entrance”

Follow the rest of my daily photos on Instagram!!

Newborn Necessities

My cousin is due with her first baby in June, so I’ve been promising to write a post about all the newborn items that have been useful. So…here we go! Most of the items are linked to Amazon, but you can buy them just about anywhere.

Swaddle Me

Caleb HATES being swaddled. Not your run-of-the-mill annoyed with swaddling, but blood curdling screams which leads to him wiggling his way right out of the swaddle. We tried the “impossible to escape” swaddle technique” and he couldn’t quite get his arms free, but totally got the rest of his body out. The Swaddle Me-s totally saved us. He is annoyed with them, but cannot escape and, therefore, sleeps soundly through the night. We are working on weaning him, but are stuck at the one arm out stage.

Rock and Play

This is seriously a life saver. Caleb feels like he’s snuggling, but I don’t actually have to hold him. He slept in it for the first few weeks because his crib was too big and it helped keep things moving (if you know what I mean!!). Now we use it for play time; I’ll put him in it with a favorite toy and he’s happy for awhile! We have a tan one (there are at least a dozen different colors), so future McBabies can enjoy it without being self-conscious.

Moby Wrap

Another life saver! Caleb loves snuggling, so when he’s in a super grumpy mood or when we are going through the airport, he’ll settle down in this. I haven’t even tried any other slings or carriers because I love it so much. And it’s so versatile because you can use it with toddlers as well and face in, out or on the hip. A friend of mine added a pocket to hers; I think that’s my next project!

Soothie Binkies

Caleb’s favorite. I had one of each kind ready for when we got home, but he used one of these in the hospital and refuses any binkie with a curved nipple. I know other kids who are exactly the opposite. You never know.

Receiving Blankets a.k.a. Burp Cloths

At first, when we received a bunch of those small receiving blankets, I figured we would never use them since they are too small for swaddling and too big for anything else. Negatory. We use them every day for burp clothes. You can never have enough burp cloths. And Caleb isn’t even a “spitter-upper”.

Fleecey Sleep and Plays

Since we spent just about 2 of Caleb’s first 3 months in New England, fleece pj’s were a must. It kept him cozy, especially at night, and I never had to worry about him being warm enough. There are also more substantial ones that work well as something to travel in.

Cloth v. Disposable Diapers

While we are mostly cloth diapering (will write an entirely different post on this later), when we travel, spend a day out, or are somewhere without a top-loading washing machine, we use disposables. I seem to be doing laundry all the time anyways, so washing cloth diapers isn’t really an imposition. We’ve been using Pampers because that’s what we used in the hospital and that’s what people gave us as gifts. We didn’t even dare start cloth until his poop transitioned and only recently started using flannel wipes instead of disposables. We use bummis prefold diapers and Thirsties diaper covers but will be switching to the diaper covers from Assunta Store.

Pump and Bottles

I knew I wanted to use the Playtex Drop In bottles since they are so easy to clean and there was no way I was risking nasty milk smell. Caleb doesn’t have any gas issues with them and doesn’t mind them one bit. I got a Medela hand pump, which is really easy to use. Around 2 weeks old, Caleb started biting, so around 4 weeks I got the Playtex pump. I’m planning on upgrading to the Medela electric pump since I use it every day. The Playtex pump would be great for occasional use (or mastitis), but it isn’t strong enough for daily use.

Binkie Straps

a.k.a. lifesavers. We have three, but I’m thinking of getting a few extra. They’re that wonderful. I got them for about $5 at Babies R Us. (DISCLAIMER: I do not like Babies R Us. They are overpriced and Target price matches with them now, so unless it’s something that’s not stocked anywhere else, I don’t step foot in that store. I’ve never had a good customer service experience and none of my friends have either).

Fleece for Diapers

This one is like it sounds: I went to the fabric store remnant section and got some fleece, cut it into rectangles, and use it in his diaper to wick away moisture because he’s such a heavy wetter. I’ll go into more detail in a cloth diapering post.

Teething Stuff

Since the poor boy is really young for teething, he doesn’t understand the concept of chewing on toys. I tried frozen washcloths, but he got mad that it wasn’t food. Then we tried Clove Oil, but he screamed louder from the taste of that then the pain (I don’t blame him, it tastes awful). He really likes the baby Orajel (it’s flavored like cherry), but I don’t want to give him too much since he’s so little. So we’ve compromised with the Hyland’s Teething Tablets; they don’t work every time, but they seem to help.

Swing

We did not get a swing originally because we figured it would take up too much space. However, in Connecticut we borrowed someone’s “monkey swing” and Caleb loved it. I underestimated how much sanity a swing can save a mom, so after a few days of one very cranky boy in Las Vegas, we ordered our own. Thank you Amazon and 2 day shipping!

Soft Blanket

Caleb is extremely tactile. The only guaranteed way to get him to relax is to snuggle him up in a super soft blanket. We discovered this at my mom’s house, so the first thing I did when we got home was to go soft blanket shopping :)

WashPod

I’ve posted about this a few times before. We absolutely love it! It’s good for up to 6 months when they can sit in the big tub on their own. Caleb LOVES bath time. He enjoys being able to sit on his own. Mr. Tactile’s favorite bath toy is the wash cloth and he splashes and smiles at all the bubbles.

The BOB

We splurged on this one and it was so worth it. This thing pushes like a dream. I even take him out on a walk or run EVERY DAY(!!) and he loves it. It has made exercising (almost) fun and Caleb likes having a chance to see other people and explore new places.

Slippers

The little Monkey has such skinny legs and ankles that slippers are the only thing that stay on! I found these on Amazon and they are perfect!

…

Here’s a list of things that I’m glad we didn’t end up getting:

• Glider – we have an old armchair that rocks and we got a rocking ottoman, so we are much more comfortable than any glider or rocking chair!
• Changing Table – We saved a lot of space by putting a changing pad on Caleb’s dresser. One of the best choices we made!
• Mobile – I’ve never really seen a mobile I’ve liked and I feel like they’re useless after a few months, so we let Caleb be entertained by his activity mat and other things around the apartment. Plus, he can get overstimulated since he loves to look around.
• Stroller System – In addition to the BOB, we got a Baby Trend Snap-n-Go. It’s perfect for errand running since it is so compact and works well in narrow spaces (it also has a lot of storage space). We have the car seat converter for the BOB, but haven’t used it yet since he’s sturdy enough to just sit in it regularly.
• Fancy Monitor – I decided early on that I didn’t want to be preoccupied or obsessed with what Caleb was doing during nap time and the best way for me to learn to do that was to learn his sounds. Using only a basic monitor has helped me distinguish between his normal sleeping sounds and his awake sounds. The one we have actually shows the decibels of sound in lights so we don’t have to even have the sound on!
• Bassinet – Another space saver. For the first couple weeks, we used the Rock & Play and that was just fine. He very quickly graduated to the crib, so there was no need for anything else.

There are other things that should be on each list, but I’m brain dead. Leave comments and I’ll edit the list as I think of things. Also, I’ll write an updated version once we enter the solid food stage!